I cannot believe it has been nearly six weeks since the birth of our baby boy! First off, you forget just how teeny tiny those little babes are and how dependent they are of you. I’m not going to lie, these times are tiring and can be all kinds of different for everyone out there, but I figured I would share some things I have experienced postpartum this time around and some tips and tricks I have found useful over the past month and even after my other pregnancies.
I want to note – by no means am I an expert or saying that these pieces of advice are the end all be all! These are just things that have worked and helped me manage postpartum. After having our daughter, I had no clue what to expect so after dealing with this once again, I feel third time is (somewhat) the charm!
What to Expect Postpartum and How to Deal – a Summary
Coming home from the hospital was both an amazing feeling, but also a major adjustment as well. The nurses weren’t there at the click of a button, helping with baby, handing me medicine right when I was able to have it and answering my questions – I was now responsible for all of that! Each time around, I discovered new ways to make things easier for me.
Also, I would like to note – the healing portion pertains specifically to vaginal delivery.
What will be happening:
You will bleed a lot during the healing process
What should I do:
For around 4-6 weeks postpartum you will bleed heavily. The hospital supplies you with heavy duty pads and also comfortable underwear that can we thrown away. Invest in comfortable cotton brief-style underwear. You are going to need something that will allow the pads to adhere and stay in place.
Also, prior to giving birth, I made sure to stock up on a couple packs of the Always Maxi Extra Heavy Overnight Pads. I keep a basket of all my toiletry supplies stocked in the bathroom at all times. This includes: the pads, peri bottle, baby wipes and if stitches occurred from a tear, dermoplast, tucks cooling pads and anti-itch cream.
What will be happening:
The first bowel movement is PAINFUL
What should I do:
Be prepared for this – it will hurt! It does help to take a stool softener daily to help with this…Keep drinking fluids and avoid foods that will constipate you.
What will be happening:
Your emotions will be all over the place
What should I do:
I personally never suffered from postpartum depression, but your nurse will talk to you about the warning signs prior to leaving the hospital. Make sure you and your spouse are aware of the symptoms.
It is so important to not be so hard on yourself. I remember feeling overwhelmed and lonely after the birth of my daughter and guilty and exhausted (now there were two little human beings to take care of, I wanted to make the most of one-on-one time with my daughter and also just turned into a SAHM at this point! I put WAY too much pressure on myself) after the birth of our son. The first baby is ALWAYS a major adjustment! You are pretty much just thrown into being a parent and that truly is a lot to handle – mentally, physically and emotionally! Read up on things, call your doctor and also talk to your mom, mother-in-law, friends/coworkers who are moms – no one has ever done it alone!
Speaking of being alone – make sure you get out, whether it is walking, some retail therapy or meeting up with a friend – it is so important to get out of the house at times (especially with your first). Don’t be afraid to pack up baby and get a change of scenery – it’s good for the both of you!
What will be happening:
There are so many time consuming tasks you need to deal with
What I should do:
SIMPLIFY your life where you can! Like I mentioned above, I had a stocked basket of toiletry items above the toilet at all times. I felt like that whole process to freshen up would take forever!
You will feel like you are constantly changing diapers. What I do is set up two diaper/wipe stations in the house (one upstairs and one downstairs). The diaper station I have upstairs is actually at the bottom of our bed. I set up a towel at the bottom of the bed and have everything we will need for a diaper change in the middle of the night (diapers, a pack of wipes, vaseline (if boy & circumcised) and diaper rash cream. It sounds so lazy, but it is very nice to just lay baby down and not have to actually stand up and do the changing in the middle of the night 😉
You will also probably feel like you are constantly feeding as well. About every 2-3 hours for newborns, so you can expect to be on the couch or rocker pretty frequently. If possible, try to go to the same location every time so you have all your supplies there – water, snacks, phone, breastfeeding pillow, breast pump, bottles, etc. Another basket or bin would also be a good thing to have for these items. There is nothing worse than having to scramble around when baby is crying hysterically or be unable to grab something once the feeding has begun!
I also set up several “baby beds” in different rooms around the house. I rotate through these basically every nap time. Sometimes, I will have baby sleep at a slight incline, other times I will lay baby flat to get him used to sleeping flat in his bassinet and crib overnight. These “beds” include a rock n play, pack n play, portable bassinet and an infant bouncer (more for when baby is awake) that has toys hanging on it for stimulation. It is nice to be able to put baby down near me when I have something I need to do – i.e. baby laundry, a shower or cleaning!
What will be happening:
You will be pretty exhausted
What should I do:
Okay, so obviously this changed for me after each kid. I can honestly say, I think my body has prepped me for life recently, but the adjustment from none to one was EXHAUSTING! There was so much new and baby is so reliant on you, that I found myself overdoing it! Try your best to relax, not only in terms of SLEEP, but in terms of MOMMYING. Over stressing it can lead you pretty tuckered out and I think that contributed to half my exhaustion at the time!
Don’t be afraid to put baby down, don’t freak out if baby will start to cry, you cannot physically be there 100% of the time or you are going to run yourself into the ground! They always say sleep when baby sleeps – I personally found that extremely difficult to do, but if you try to routine yourself to one nap around the same time every day, I would imagine that would help you because you are expecting it and also baby! Speaking of routine…
What will be happening:
You are going to feel a little “out of control”
What should I do:
Routine is out the window when it comes to having a newborn – at least for the first couple weeks to month. This was probably the toughest pill for me to swallow. I was so set in my ways of getting up early, getting things done before the kids were up or when I was working, I was able to shower, eat breakfast and get ready leisurely – yea that changes pretty quickly when your baby arrives!
One thing I have discovered, the importance with coming up with a NEW REVISED routine. I did not do this after the birth of my daughter which I regret! We essentially let our daughter take over. She ruled the roost in terms of how our day would go… we didn’t follow a similar schedule to daycare on weekends. Instead of following her sleep and feeding cues, we misread them… Shockingly, babies LOVE routine!
It was after the birth of our second child that the light bulb went off! I tracked feeding and sleeping times on my phone using this App and discovered some “trends”. What I discovered using this “data”, is that my son would generally feed around the same time every night and day – with slight variance. I started to understand his feeding cues better and could also tell the difference between him being super tired vs. hungry.
This is where I created our own NEW routine and I cannot tell you how incredible that was for me – knowing what to expect – and for him to have that regularity as well.
I hope this all doesn’t sound too overwhelming, but the purpose of this post is to make it so you won’t be overwhelmed, so you generally know what to expect and that you need not worry because you are a MOM and it comes naturally!
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